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THE WOODS BURGER KITCHEN

THE WOODS BURGER KITCHEN

So is The Woods Burger Kitchen Brightons best burger? Agents Hasburglar and Agent Pennywise are on the case. 

AGENT HASBURGLAR

The Woods Burger Kitchen has been on our radar for quite some time. Being out in Worthing though it’s a bit of a mission to go for a munch. Mission excepted, myself and Agent Pennywise (plus the kids :0| ) set off. 

SURPRISE

Firstly a pleasant surprise. Who knew that once you escape the cluster fuck that is Brightons road network and extortionate parking fees, the surrounding towns are actually a pleasure to drive around, and easy (and cheap) to park in. Jackpot. Best of all you can park two mins walk away in a multi-storey. 

We arrived at Woods just as it opened. Were met by some cheery ladies and were given the choice of where to sit. They quickly sorted the kids some colouring apparatus while we tackled the menu. 

ITS BIIIIG

First thing you notice about the menu is the size of it. There are a lot of choices. All with some sort of amusing quip along side the burgers names. We counted 6 meaty, 3 chicken, 1 pulled pork, 1 veggie, 1 vegan and a partridge in a pear tree. Thats before you get to the non burger section (but why would you want to do that?) and the 14 sides. Theeeeen you have the milkshakes (more on that later) and the desserts. Oh and a kids menu! Forgot about them :0|

BLUE MOON

Between us we went for the Blue Moon and a Chupacabra burger. Agent Ayla Eats had been talking about trying a burger with black pudding in, so when we saw it on the menu it was a must have. Shame she wasn’t with us on this trip! We opted for some mozzarella sticks, fries and the kids had chicken bites and mac ‘n’ cheese. We were starving and the kids were driving us mad. Thankfully the food arrived promptly. 

KING BURGER

When the food arrived their was a definite wow factor. Anything that needs to be held together with a stick is fine by us. The mozzarella sticks were huge! Like a plate of breadcrumbed babies arms! The kids were also happy and dived straight in which gave us a chance to savour what was in front of us. 

We shared the Blue Moon and Chupacabra, personally I wish I had kept the whole of the Blue Moon. Dang this was a good burger. It really was. It reminded me of the first time I tried a Burger King Bacon Double Cheese Burger nearly 30 years ago, but on steroids (the burger not me). It was so flavoursome, juicy pink patties, and a delicious blue cheese sauce (which to be honest could have been stronger).

The crispy smokey bacon was great too adding a nice texture. But the real unexpected hero of this burger was the golden portobello mushroom. It added an earthy taste to proceedings which complimented everything else perfectly. This was one of the best burgers I’ve had for quite some time. 

For me the Chupacabra burger wasn’t quite as successful. These was just a bit too much going on and the black pudding made it incredible rich. It looked fantastic but was a little bit heavy on the gherkins (they were quite chunky) and mustard. There are so many choices on this menu that I cant wait to go back and try some more but I will have to have two, as that Blue Moon was just so friggin’ good. 

MOZZA

The babies arm Mozza sticks were a thing to behold. When they first arrived they were amazing. Only problem was, the portion was so large that by the time ten mins had passed they were starting to congeal and go a bit hard. These are defo a sharing side. Probably between about 4 of you to prevent a stiff mozzarella stick…. I didn’t really try many of the fries but they seemed ok. Agent Pennywise had more of them and was a tad underwhelmed but he was too busy salivating over his half of the Blue Moon. 

The kids Mac ‘N’ Cheese was tasty, as were the Chicken bites. They polished off the lot. 

MY MILKSHAKE BRINGS ALL THE BOYS TO THE YARD

The reason I had been restrained with the fries was I had spotted the milkshake list. These looked proper filth! Annoyingly I forgot to get some pics as we got them to go. Check out their website homepage and you will get the idea. I had the milky bar one (I forget the name now) and it was heaven. Best milkshake I have had in years. It properly finished me off. It was also the perfect end to a fantastic meal. Its also worth mentioning that this was incredibly reasonable. Maybe its due to them not having to pay Brightons extortionate rates, but this was great value for money. 

My only regret about this escapade is that we hadn’t made the trip sooner. Get to Worthing Brightonians. You wont be disappointed.  

AGENT PENNYWISE

WTF thrice in a week!? Seriously though I will be returning to the shadows shortly. If only to avoid Hasburglars constant hounding for my review. If this is shorter than normal you can blame him. 
 
We shared similar opinions on most of what we had. The Blue Moon was definitely the highlight of the two burgers. I could have eaten 3 of them (not because they were small you realise. Just because it was ball achingly amazing). The mushroom was a genius touch. It was simple compared to some of their burgers, which is why I think it will probably be one of their most successful ones. The Chupacabra wasn’t quite on the same level for me. 
 

BATTLING FLAVOURS

The combination of the chorizo AND the black pudding was one ingredient too many for me. Remove on or the other and I think it would work better. The gherkin was also a bit chunky for my liking. Maybe a thinner sliced home pickled gherkin would work better (I think these were straight out the jar jobbies, although I could be wrong) with a tad less mustard (which kind of overpowered everything). 
 

SIDE WINDER

The sides were good, although the fries didn’t blow me away. Those Mozzarella sticks were massive!!! Like Hasburglar said though, eat them quick! Wash them down with one of the great selection of beers on offer. I went for a Peanut Butter Beer that I have had before and absolutely loved. 
 

CHOCOLATY MILKY GOODNESS

The real highlight on the drinks front though were those milkshakes which are a dessert in themselves. I forget the one I had but it was a chocolate beast. So good. Probably just as well we had them after the burgers or we would have struggled to finish them! They were that rich and creamy. 
 

COME ON DOWN….THE PRICE IS RIGHT

When the bill came our chins nearly hit the floor. It was only just over £40 for the 4 of us (2 adults and 2 kids) and we were stuffed. One of the best value meals we have had on this burger journey. 
 
Its easy to see why The Woods Burger Kitchen is sitting high and mighty pipped only by the awesome Humble Kitchen at the top of our Burger League. Worth the trip to Worthing, and I didn’t even mention the amazing house sauce (10/10 for me)! Head west people (I have got my sights set on ‘The Mountain’ next time, a 4 patty behemoth . 
 

SUMMARY

The Woods Burger Kitchen has shot right in at No. 2 In The Brighton Burger League which tells you everything you need to know about just how tasty they are.
 

Their whole set up is great. A nice space to eat. Not as cramped in as you feel with Honest, and to a certain extent Patty & Bun (the two walls of large windows probably help). Not as edgy as Meat Liquor but looks like they do some banging cocktails etc too. Although being in Worthing, not sure when I would ever get to try them and still manage to get home. 

Don’t be put off by the journey to get here from Brighton. It took us barely 20 mins on bank holiday. Enjoy the ease of parking that didn’t cause you to remortgage. 

But most of all enjoy the banging burgers. Cant wait to be back to try the rest at some point. Only 10 more to try. Grab a mixture of sides to share (defo share those babies arms). Wash them down with the best milkshake I have had in decades. Be warned though you may get diabetes after eating/drinking it but it would be worth it!

 
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