Brighton Burger Bureau Stockburger Brightons Best Burgers
Brighton Burger Bureau

Brighton Burger Bureau

STOCK BURGER CO.

AGENTS ON DUTY

Agent Hasburglar | Agent Big ‘Mac’ Dave

THE STOCK BURGER CO.

So is Stock Burger Co. Brightons best burger? Agents Hasburglar and Agent Big ‘Mac’ Dave are on the case. 

AGENT HASBURGLAR

I remember going to the launch night of Stock Burger Co. a few years back. It was a fun night, the highlight being when they rolled out their ‘Hub Cap Burger’. A beast of a burger that wouldn’t have looked out of place on Man V Food. Alas the Hub Cap is no more, which is a shame as watching someone tackle that was pretty much the only thing that would have lured me back.

It turns out the only reason we did come back was that Agent Big ‘Mac’ Dave won a free meal for 2 here in a raffle so off we set.
 

LOCATION, LOCATION, LOCATION

One thing Stock Burger does have going for it is its location. Bang on the seafront just across from the i360. To be fair its the wrong side of the road and is attached to a Holiday Inn, but it’s a sun trap thats for sure. The funky new paint job really makes it stand out and with the light and airy decor inside there are worse places to sit and eat. We opted for a sunny seat on the terrace.
 

SPOILT FOR CHOICE

The menu is pretty large with plenty of options so after a few mins the cheery and very helpful waiter came and took our order. We went for ‘Stock Burgers’ and a section of sides including Mac & Cheese bites, courgette fries, cauliflower bites (cauliflower really is the rage right now eh!?) and some fries. I also opted for an Oreo Milkshake, which in hindsight was a mistake as by the time the food arrived I had filled up on that. It was delicious though although nothing close to the milkshakes at The Woods Burger Kitchen.
 

NICE LOOKING, AVERAGE TASTING

The food arrived and actually looked pretty decent. You certainly get a lot for your money. The portion sizes were large, putting some of the other burger joints around town to shame. Branded paper (you know we love it) and your metal tray and buckets were the order of the day here. It looked good if not groundbreaking. 
 

HIGHS & LOWS

Firstly the highs. The sides were actually pretty tasty, particularly the Mac & Cheese Bites and the cauliflower. The Courgette Fries were also goof if a tad on the soggy side which was a shame. The fries were pretty bog standard, nothing to get excited about there. 
 
A bit of a let down were all the various dips. Standard off the shelf stuff all the way, some starting to form a skin which is never nice. Would of been nice of they’d of had a really wow sauce but these weren’t it. 
 
The real let down though was the actual burger itself. I nearly had to reach for my toolbox and dig out the hammer and chisel to get through that brick of a bun. By far the worst bun we have come across. It must have been stale as I can’t imagine the bun is meant to be that hard. Likewise the patty itself was bland and unexciting. Think supermarket BBQ burgers and you are pretty much there. So dense and heavy with not much flavour. Such a shame. 
 

ITS FREE

Thankfully we won this meal in a competition. Looking at the menu prices it isn’t cheap for what is effectively very average food. They get an extra point for value purely because of the large portions. Its all a bit TGI Fridays but for burgers. Would we go back? I doubt it, not for a burger anyway. Maybe for some of those sides as a snack. A nice looking place that sadly misses the mark if you are looking for the sort of burger quality that real burger geeks like us are after.
 

AGENT BIG ‘MAC’ DAVE

What you see is what you get – Holiday Inn in a Bun.

Stock Burger has been on our radar for a while. You can’t ignore it, on the Kingsway, the biggest burger billboard in town.

FOR THE MASSES

I knew what I was getting before it arrived, you can’t expect ‘extraordinary’ when it must cater for the mid-stream-masses that frequent the Holiday Inn(where Stock Burger is housed)… however, what was extreme was the range of extras, sides and the complete customisation they offer(+ a great drinks menu)… hat’s off to you Stock Burger, you’ve done this well!!

Special Agent Ben Hasburgular has just signed with DuPont to test the stretching capabilities of lycra… so he set about ordering a milkshake & most of the sides to accompany his burger…

I ordered the ‘Burger Builder’ double, with blue cheese, slaw & baconnaise.

LOVE-VIBES

Service was great, though the drinks were a bit slow… we were in no rush, it was a perfect day for people watching, as the new arrivals walked in & the excited weekenders walked out… no doubt the majority will be convening in Stock Burger at the end of the night… many having pulled some other eager individual filled with weekender love-vibes, hoping to sneak them into the hotel through the restaurant, away from the watchful eye of the reception.

The food came & credit again, this was very well presented.

DUPONT

DuPont made 1 basic mistake when selecting Special Agent Ben Hasburgular to test their new lycra, they underestimated his ability to be stuffed on 1 milkshake… I had the pleasure of listening to him moan about being full while he pushed food into his mouth for the remainder of the meal.

Burger was well cooked, the bun was basic, the extras were ok… I was worried about it being a wet-mix that I’d ordered with the slaw & baconnise, it all held together pretty well…. Fries were ok & mac/cheese was ok. Nothing too memorable, but it was nice.

CAULI BITES

Where Stock Burger did excel was the cauliflower bites… bitten by the repulsive cauliflower bites in Wolfsmouth a few months back (Wolfsmouth have assured us that this was a mistake on their part), the cauliflower bites at Stock Burger were excellent, crispy & well-seasoned.. very tasty!!

What you see is what you get here… for a basic burger with an excellent drinks range, I’d seriously consider going back. Do it simple & do it well… no fireworks, but the 2 key boxes ticked.

SUMMARY

The Stock Burger Co. is one of those burger joints around town where we knew we had to go and review it at some point, but weren’t particularly excited about doing so. So it proved. We left as unexcited as we arrived, thankful we hadn’t paid a premium price for run of the mill food. The sides were good but surely the hero needs to be the burger itself? If you love your portions huge then this could be for you (I’m looking at you Agent BMD). It is nice to sit outside on a sunny day (although there are better locations with less traffic noise). This is more TGI’s and Ed’s Diner than Patty & Bun, Meatliquor and Honest Burger.  Agent Big ‘Mac’ Dave summed it up well. A basic burger with no fireworks. The search for a Centurion continues. 
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